You’re not alone! In the old days of distributing messages from department to department companies had vacuum tubes where you put the message into a container which was put into a tube that would get sucked in and plopped into a distribution center or mail room. That’s how I felt I landed on planet earth and into this human suit. Can you relate?
I didn’t know where I was going or where I was landing and worse, for what purpose, at least I don’t remember knowing all of this beforehand. I sure as hell wanted answers. Questions such as where did I come from, what am I doing here and how do I do this human thing were all I could think about for most of my childhood. I thought I was crazy. Then low and behold at around 9 or 10 years old, out of nowhere I received a message. It was like an explosion filling every nook and cranny of my being YOU ARE LOVE! It was powerful, magnificent, and all at once I knew it was true. I didn’t know what to do with that and as I grew older I still wanted answers to all these questions, although I was certain that psychotherapy wasn’t right for me nor was organized religion. I felt stuck, alone, and lost.
Since we don’t come equipped with a manual the road to understanding who we are and what we are meant to be/do here can be pretty rocky, scary and let’s face it, quite messy. At least that’s how it was for me. I didn’t know where I belonged or how I fit in and unfortunately I put the responsibility and burden on others for making me feel welcome. If I wasn’t invited or included in something I’d feel less than or unappreciated. I’d blame them for not doing enough to make me feel like I mattered or that I belonged. Over and over again, I found myself in situations that reinforced my feeling alienated.
It took me a while to learn that I had to take some responsibility for my life. At some point my butt got bruised enough for being pushed back onto myself that I had to learn to take responsibility for finding my own voice and my own sense of belonging. No one else can put my stake in the ground and claim my place in the world but me.
Then I was introduced to astrology by the very Founder of this Institute, Jim Sher. Astrology along with other metaphysical teachings became the key to the blueprint of a life that I was set upon all those years ago. I was never into learning languages growing up, the human language was tough enough. But the language of astrology spoke to me at the deepest level and showed me how to find my unique voice and uncover talents within me that I didn’t even know I possessed. Astrology helped me to discover that this is exactly where I belonged and gave me the road map to understand how best to embody my true nature and how to express it in the world. It felt like the planets and signs in my birth chart spoke to me in a code that was meant for me to help me understand and make sense of the life that I had been living and what I was currently experiencing. It affirmed that I wasn’t broken or needed to be fixed, quite the contrary. I began to understand that I and everyone else has certain lessons to learn and that we are whole and complete with our own unique purpose that contributes to a larger whole. It informed me that I wasn’t crazy and my being here is not random. I am forever grateful.
We are all born with this treasure map (although it might not feel like treasure at first) and as I discovered we are the ones that breathe life into it. I am an alien no more. I found my place, my footing in this human suit and maybe you can too. Learn more about me here.